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Part 1
Nnadia's Personality I am Chung Chung Chan Chung Ling. I think if someone asked me this question, I would respond, "What do you think? What do you feel my personality is like?" Usually the opinions I get from my friends is "Wa! You're actually really wild and like to play around," and "You're actually kinda crazy." This is what my close friends will tell me. Usually in front of others, I will appear to be more quiet and calm. These are false images! People will think "How come the Nnadia I usually see doesn't give me th at kind of feel? After knowing you, I find that you're a crazy person who likes to talk a lot." And they'll say that I can be a psychiatrist. Why? Because when they have problems, they like to ask me and with my limited knowledge and wisdom, I will help them to solve it. Usually I'm pretty good at solving their problems because I think that there's nothing that's impossible in this world as long you are dedicated to solving the problem and place sincerity and thought on the problem. So I usually will teach them to tolerate others more and accept others more and forgive others more. That's the most basic essence of being a human. A very positive thing about my personality is that I don't usually get really mad at my friends. Even if a friend does something bad to me or makes me unhappy, I would solve the problems with that person by sunset and then I can eat my dinner without any worries or concerns and sleep with a smile. That's the great thing about my personality. If there's something that really hurts me, I usually have a record of a month of worrying over the thing. But I still forget quickly. I like to stick my problems and worries in the back of my mind and to quickly forgive the people around me because I think that to be able to meet them is already destiny. To cherish the time together is very good knowledge. Why don't I accept the friends around me? It's better than counting their wrongs. This is a very positive thing about me. But there's a negative thing about me - I'm not a very ambitious person. When dealing with things, I won't really want to do it. Like with work, I'm a lazy person - not really ambitious about it. Maybe because I believe in destiny too much. I know that a lot of things are meant to happen or what you're able to possess in life will happen in your life. Don't really need to put work into it yourself to get it. In a commercial industry, this is really not an attitude that I should have. But I also think maybe because Hong Kong is so small but the population is high, we're all very close to each other, so there's much higher levels of competition. When someone's better than you, there's this need to compare and be better than them. If the population density wasn't so high and the competition wasn't as much, people would spend more time to enjoy their life. That's my goal as a human. So the things that happen in my life, I will cherish. The things that don't happen, I won't work to obtain more. I will just enjoy my life. Nnadia's Childhood When I was a child, I was actually a bit of a loner. I had my own thoughts and ideas - I felt that the world was in my hands. Everyone should be able to fulfill my expectations. A lot of times, I was unhappy. I met more mistakes and obstacles than most. Because not everyone can do what you expect of them. I was very picky on a lot of things. I became a pretty self-centered person. Usually I didn't have many friends because I thought they couldn't meet up to my expectations. For example, I expect others to be sincere and when they can't do it, I wouldn't want to be friends with them. When you have a lot of expectations and can't lower your standards, you lose a lot of friends. When I grew older, I saw more things. I knew that I should accept others more. If you don't open yourself to accept others, then you shouldn't expect others to accept you. Now I have more and more friends and they're all really close ones that I can talk to. Once you become my friend, we'll be very close. The happiest thing for me is when I was in kindergarten, my grades were #1 of all the students. Then I didn't really understand much about being #1 or #2 in my concept, so why is that so memorable to me? Because my award for being #1 was a small toy and that small toy was the beginning of my interest in music. It was made of small metal plates - those dong dong dong - those do-re-me-fa-so-la-ti-do - the most 7 or 8 notes. I'm not even sure what it's called. It was just an instrument that you hit. I'm a bit curious why I'm not interested in playing the drums now. But instead, it gave me my interest in music and afterwards, I began experiencing with music - it began with this metal plate. [Vonny: I think Nnadia's referring to a xylophone.] When I was a child, I wanted to be an astronaut. Like I said before, I didn't have many friends. I liked to lie on the roof and look at the sky. The clouds moved so fast and I didn't know if it was the earth moving or the sky moving, I didn't know the reason. I was only 6 at the time. And looking at the sky turning and the clouds, I was really interested in the outer space. My biggest goal was to become a female astronaut and fly on a rocket to outer space and do research. But my grades in math, chemistry, and biology were not that good. They were hardly enough for me to get into university. I was actually better in communication studies. So I couldn't become an astronaut. Nnadia's Entry into the Entertainment Biz When I was 14 or 15, there was a singing competition. In fact, I had always loved to sing. Whenever there were singing competitions or concerts at school, I always participated. It was because TVB had an "Idol Imitation Contest" - to imitate Sally Yeh - that my friends told me to enter it so that we could use the prize money and have dinner together. I thought, "Sure why not? For you guys, I'll go." I won the prize and I pak pak lor yau ("hit my butt" which means to just pick up and go and not care about anything else) and the thing would end. And after eating the dinner, we just all went about going to school. Then the next day, I received a call from TVB - back then youth ambassadors were a big hit - and they wanted to hire me as one. But it was full-time and I was in high school. There was no way I could quit school so I didn't want to do it. Then a record company called me up and said that I could work - record an album, shoot movies - when I was off from school. I thought "Ok ok. I'll try." So I was in a work-study kind of situation for a long time. Now I'm working full time in the entertainment business. Part 2 Does Nnadia Think She Looks like Sally Yeh? When I was small, I thought a little. Maybe it's cause Sally Yeh is a bit unfortunate [for having Nnadia look like her]. I think back then I didn't really look clearly. Because Sally is very pretty but my own face was not that well developed and my facial features grew in individually - my eyes would grow one way and my nose would grow another. But slowly growing up, I developed my own character and my facial features came together. I developed my own Chan Chung Ling face. I don't look like her now. When I look back, there's a huge difference between us. Nnadia's Early Days in the Biz It took me a while to get comfortable and plus, I'm not a very ambitious person when it comes to my work. I had school to go to and I always thought that school was a great environment. School was my way to expand my knowledge and use my potential. When it came to work, there were always a lot of things that I could not get used to. I was a small 14, 15 year old kid, a lot of things were so new and surprising to me. Like I would be taking the train to school and all of a sudden, I see myself on a poster on the train. These big pictures plastered all over - I would feel a lot of pressure. There was more pressure than enjoyment. So in that work-study situation, I actually studied a lot and used little time to work. What kind of things happened? For example, a lot of times, there were unpleasant things and misunderstandings between people and myself that I did not want to clear up. Like if I met with somebody that I did not like, I would not care. I would rather not interact with them than to think of an idea to clear up any problems. Do I think that I was avoiding problems? I would only think that I didn't have the capacity to deal with it. Now that I'm older and I think back on it, after being faced with problems and life and death situations with my family, I see things much more clearly. I feel that I should cherish the people who are around me and that I can use sincerity to communicate with them and understand them. This is a question of whether you, yourself, would go and do this. And I think that now I would go and do this and so I have a lot more friends now. In the past, I would not go and try to understand others. I would feel regret that I entered the entertainment business so early, but I would not regret entering this circle. It's because this circle has provided me with a great opportunity to practice. Honestly, the popularity and the money that I get from my work is just "smoke before my eyes." But the things that I learn and the people that I meet - that's what I care about. At least, I have not wasted my time. I have learned a lot of things and gained a lot of friendships and relationships. This is a great thing. But I still regret that I entered this business so early. Because I was not prepared and did not have such a good foundation, I needed a lot of time to get comfortable as an artist. And also during this process of adjusting, there would be a lot of ups and downs and I would hurt others or hurt myself but not know that I did. I would cause others unhappiness and when I think back on it, I feel that it's a bad thing. In my heart, there's a sense of being unable to control things. It's hard to say sorry to this person or to be able to meet up with this person again now or ten years later. It's a big disappointment to not be able to apologize to this person. Nnadia's Most Unforgettable TV Series I really like Instincts. This series marked a change in my acting because I realized that I needed to get into my character when acting. My first series was Songbird. Even though I gained my popularity, fame, and overseas markets because of Songbird, I was only a 17, 18-year-old girl and had virtually no experience in society. How did I go about acting as a 30-something year old woman who experienced so many difficulties in life and love? Her life experiences were so much more than mine and so a lot of things, I relied on imitating. I really was acting. I couldn't give life to the character. But in Instincts, I learned that I could give life to the character if I put my heart into it. This is because more or less the character really resembled me and the role was able to stir up my own feelings. Then I realized that I really couldn't rely on just imitation when acting. If you haven't experienced it, you really don't know how much feeling to put into it. And so the more life experiences, the better. Nnadia's Most Unforgettable Acting Experience I think that would be Snow Wolf Lake. I'm pretty happy during most of my other on-stage performances. It would be as easy as putting on a shirt and I would really enjoy it. But Snow Wolf Lake is a musical and really requires a great deal of ability. And my feeling was that I could not mess it up so there was a lot of pressure. I remember the last performance the most. I was already so thin because of the pressure because I was losing weight each day. Even though it was only 7 nights of performances, I lost at least a pound a day. So the dress was really loose on me and I had a gauze on as an underdress which was loose as well. And so during the performance, there's one scene in which Michael Tse Tin Wah slaps me and I fall to the floor. In the midst of that, my underdress slipped off a little and when I stood up again, the underdress was trailing on the floor. The only thing I could do was to pretend that I had hurt my leg and hold onto my leg so that I could hold onto my underdress as well. I just wanted to finish that scene. It's a good thing that I was almost about to die anyway, so when Jacky Cheung Hok Yau lifted me into his arms, he lifted my slipping underdress too. At that time, I felt the need to be able to deal with unexpected things when on stage and the need for experience and quick reactions. Other times, when I'm just performing a concert by myself, I can talk about these things as a joke. But this is a musical. I can't smile and say 'Sorry, let me put on my dress before I continue performing.' That was pretty unforgettable and it was like I had to wipe away my sweat. Nnadia's Most Unforgettable Scene in Life That would be during the time of my adopted mother's death. At that time, I did not cry. This mother of mine was someone really really close to me and someone I really cared about. Even though we weren't related by blood, she gave me unconditional love. Suddenly, this selfless good person left me and I felt - the pain was in a way that I couldn't even cry. But in my mind, I really believed that one day I would be able to see her again. This is a strong belief of mine. Watching her die was really unfo rgettable for me, especially because she died of cancer, and now, I still have the scene of her death in my mind. When I feel unhappy and I remember her death, I feel that she would give me strength. Part 3 Nnadia's Most Unforgettable Episode in Life I really look back on the time when my adopted mother was sick and I had to take care of her. We learned how to knit sweaters together and it turned out that in her 50-something years of life, she had never knitted a sweater before. She didn't know to knit and I ended up having to teach her. She would sing while knitting. That moment really made me feel at ease and I've never experienced a more comfortable time. Nnadia's Most Unforgettable Scene in Life Also, I had this high school principal who died of brain cancer. Gosh, all my unforgettable scenes are about death, that's really not a lucky thing. But why was it so unforgettable? Because my principal was a devout Catholic. He was so good that I feel that it would be pretty hard to find another person as good. In my mind, I have the scene where he had just finished surgery. His brain was swollen and his head was swollen - if I said it as a joke, his head was like the short potato head guy in Master Q [Master Q is a famous Chinese comic and Potato Head is his short sidekick with a large, melon-shaped head.] - his head was really big. After that brain surgery, I felt that human life is really fragile. I don't know how to say - it's like at any time, the things in your life can be taken away and you haven't been able to prepare for it. Through these two events [adopted mother and principal's death], I learned how to cherish the friends around me and how to cherish time. I won't waste what I have in my life. I really feel that God has treated me really well. Even if I would regret that I entered this entertainment business too early, but no matter what, it's already happened. What happened you have to accept. It's like the book that I read says - you have to accept it cheerfully, accept it in a happy mood. Because you have to learn how to understand and see it clearly and then you will appreciate the things that God has given you. If you're given something and you don't know how to cherish it, then if I would feel that there's no need to give anything to this person. We should learn how to cherish and be thankful. A friend told me, "What you've received in life is so much better and more than other people. A lot of people who started working in the same time that you did [in entertainment] have all disappeared, but you're still here and continuing working wonderfully, you should count your blessings." These words are really useful and I keep them in my heart. Why didn't I realize that? If you count your blessings everyday, you would realize that what you have is so so much more than what you don't have. It depends on what you focus on. Everyone can carry a magnifying glass and whether you use it magnify what you have and what you don't have depends on yourself. So I learned to use it on what I have. The very least, my smile is more natural and it comes from inside of me - it's not fake. Nnadia's Thoughts On Religion I've always rejected the customs and ceremonies of religion. I don't like to go to Church and have to kneel and worship, to have to do so many things. Can these customs really make me more devout? I don't think so. It just adds a lot of - it makes it as if I'm unable to be a devout Christian and actually adds sin to myself. The guiltier you feel, the more you will avoid participating with a Church community. Like there are some people in this entertainment circle who have left the Church because they realized that they couldn't fulfill the customs. I tell them, "Religion isn't your makeup. It's not something that you have to put on your face to tell people that you're a Christian. You should live your religion out - it would be so much better." For me, I feel that I am actually living in it. No matter what time it is, there will be traces of my faith. In my mind, I will think of whether or not I should do something - I have to pass my own conscience. My faith is like my conscience. If I've passed my own conscience and my faith, then I know that I can do it. It proves that my faith goes along with my life and that is when I'm most devout. When I was small, I did think that I should go to Church everyday. If I don't, I would be a bad person, a sinful person. But now I don't force it. Of course, there are some people who need these kinds of customs to fulfill their faiths, to make themselves act better. But myself, I think that I've already passed the stage when I have to use rituals to force myself to be a good Christian. I will use my heart and fulfill my faith myself. Does Nnadia Like to Cry? Recently, I've cried less and actually I smile at everything. When I think of something I feel is funny, I will laugh to the point that other people think I'm crazy. "How can this be - are you laughing for real or is it fake?" When I think of something funny that happened or a joke that my friend just told me, I can just start laughing when I'm in the streets. As for crying - I don't cry because of my problems anymore. But I will cry when I'm touched. Like when I'm watching a movie and the mood really moves my heart, then my tears will fall quietly. And I'll be the one who doesn't want others to see. If you can't see me, then I can wipe my tears away. Nnadia's Most Tearful Moment I had just finished watching a movie Life is Beautiful. I had thought to myself that it's a movie and I know how a movie is made because I'm an artist myself. I know that when you're acting, you might be acting to the air. It's not that real right? But I was really touched by the movie's mood and I just couldn't control myself. And after I finished the movie - I was at home watching an LD [Laserdisc] - I said to my family who were all sitting down "Excuse me." I intentionally went into the washroom to cry everything out - I just didn't care. I felt it really was able to touch something inside my own heart - a lot of times, when we face obstacles, if we could be as optimistic as the main male character [in the movie], then everything would be great. This was one of the reasons that made me cry. Another reason was the little child really did an excellent job. That innocent and naïve quality - how can you find such a kindhearted child? That scene really touches you and I didn't care about anything, just wanted to cry all my emotions out. I cried for about 5 minutes. That's a lot. I looked at the mirror and said to myself, "All right already! You should shut yourself up! It's really annoying!" (HK RTHK: September 1999) |